HELP! I blew it!

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milagiro
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HELP! I blew it!

Post by milagiro »

I had a small list of living Milazzo's still in the Camporeale area, and with the goading of my genealogist friends, I telephoned them. No one spoke English and my Italian is dodgy at best - we did not connect and I have the feeling I left them with the impression that I am the illigatimate daughter of their husband(s) ooops!

If someone would kindly volunteer to telephone on my behalf, I will gladly reimburse any expenses. Please post me back and I will give you a loose script - thank you!
- milagiro
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juanminbar
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Re: HELP! I blew it!

Post by juanminbar »

hello, i have to say unless someone is at your side when the call was taking place it would a foolish venture. if they have questions, if you have questions you would find in either case a lack of communication.

may i suggest that you correspond by mail, in italian, and let them know what you are searching for. if you decide to go this route include in the mail a envelope addressed back to you plus several dollars to cover the cost for mailing.

remember to keep it simple.

good luck, j
milagiro
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Re: HELP! I blew it!

Post by milagiro »

juanminbar,
Thank you....and you are right! I learned my lesson (the hard way) and will write only a letter in the future!

I was anxious, I had so much documentation and hoped to connect, but I was wrong. Now I will be careful....I promose :)
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juanminbar
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Re: HELP! I blew it!

Post by juanminbar »

click onto the site below. you may find it helpful.

http://www.initaly.com/gene/mem/letter1.htm

john
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Re: HELP! I blew it!

Post by wldspirit »

Sorry to laugh at your expense.....but that was the best laugh I've had in some time.... :lol:
I love a sarcastic sense of humor!

I actually know of confirmed relatives in my town of origin, but with my limited Italian, I would never attempt to call them, they only speak Italian
and have no comprehension of English. But I do applaud your effort.

I am providing you with a letter which must be constructed, not as simple as a standard form letter, but I like the fact that it gives additional options to include in your request.

Letter

Also, some basic Italian genealogy words:

Genealogy word list

hope this helps!! :wink:
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Clicker
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Re: HELP! I blew it!

Post by Clicker »

milagiro....don't feel bad.....I did the same thing about 6 years ago when I first started.

The conversation was truly hilarious in retrospect (although at the time I was horrified by the wordstuff coming out of my mouth to desperately try and make the conversation work) and it provided my husband with days of material to laugh about.....to this day if I want to make him smile I threaten to call Italy.

I regrouped, and wrote a letter, and the relatives STILL rib me about my phonecall and my grasp of Italian, but it made for a great icebreaker and made for some fun times.
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Re: HELP! I blew it!

Post by wldspirit »

If only the generation before us had thought to teach us a firm grasp of the Italian language!!!!! I can only cringe at the thought of calling Italy....
with my skill, I would end up cursing at someone unintentially......
the one thing I did pick up from the previous generation.... :P
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PeterTimber
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Re: HELP! I blew it!

Post by PeterTimber »

I hardly think you could wind up cursing someone since Italian is spoken as if you are about to kiss and only great exertion would bring about some salty expression that you recall being referred to as a naughty child....but I do recall that before my father took a wack at my backside he would say " La giustizia vuol venire" (Justice is on the way) hardly a shocker wouldn't you say? =Peter=
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Re: HELP! I blew it!

Post by wldspirit »

Grasping for words.....knowing me, I wouldn't rule out the possibility.
:oops:

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juanminbar
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Re: HELP! I blew it!

Post by juanminbar »

milagiro, after re-reading your message i thought i would share my experience regarding phone calls.
i was patiently waiting for help from a cousin who was older than i and did not hear from her.
i decided to take matters into my own hands. i knew there were 11 families in the village with my surname. i had all the phone numbers and i started my calling.
the first one a woman answered and i stated ''do you CA BISH'' english. she in quick fashion hung up on me.
the second was a gentleman and once again i asked ''do you ca-bish'' english. he acknowledge that he did not.
the third call a younger person answered and i asked if he understood engish. he said yes but stated he had a younger brother who knew more than him. we chatted slowly and he then advised me that he had a brother who lived in america and no doubt could speak and understand my english. he gave me his phone number and i called him but his line was busy.
a short time passed and i received a phone call. it was the brother who lives in new jersey. he told me his family called him to make him aware of my call. also when the phone rang they were all concerned because they thought something may have happened to him since my call to the village was almost three oclock in the morning. i overlooked the six hour difference.
i explained what i was doing and he told me the woman he was working for emigrated from the village and was much older than him. he contacted her and she than called me.
i advised her that i was pursing family who would be related to me. she was elated to think i wanted to gather data on my family roots.....now the clincher. she said her mother still lived in the village and she was 90+ and was sure she would know my family.
the next day she called me and said her mother knew the family. i explained i was taking a cruise and the ship stopped in messina.
this lovely lady(ANGEL) orchestrated everything upon my arrival.
she hadsomeone pick me and my wife up and take us to the village. she also had person from the village there to translate for us.
the family was great. our visit with them was great. they did everything possible to make our five hour visit very special......and that my dear is my story..............john
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Re: HELP! I blew it!

Post by wldspirit »

You give me hope.....a beautiful story!
Now to get brave and get over my anxiety with regard to speaking to a total stranger, family or not, who may or may not understand me.... :oops:

Milagiro........at least you were brave enough to go for it.......even if you
have the feeling I left them with the impression that I am the illigatimate daughter of their husband(s) ooops!
:wink:
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Re: HELP! I blew it!

Post by Eleven »

LOL I'm sorry..but, I found that so comical..lol

I would have loved to be a fly on the wall watching that!!
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fredoniapeaches
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Re: HELP! I blew it!

Post by fredoniapeaches »

here's my poor language speaking story...and it all happened right here in my town. A local family was hosting a friend of theirs from Portugal...and they had brought him in to a local Bar to meet people. and I had been there for a few cocktails already chatting with friends...enough cocktails that one would forget their graps of foreign languages isn't all that great. so I was introduced...and exclaimed..."portugal, how wonderful! I have several friends from Brazil! (they speak portugese there)" he asked if I spoke portugese...I said no...but somehow we managed to have this hour long conversation in a mix of Spanish, Italian, German and French. I don't even know FRENCH!! but one of us would say something in one language...and the reply would come in a different language...we were having a grand time...everyone else in the place looked at us like we were lunatics!! because no one could follow along!!

and then on another night, I shocked the hell out of my husband when we were introduced to a guy who was deaf...and he and I hit it raight off...and we had this very long conversation in sign language...and my astonished man looked at me and said "when the hell did you learn sign language"...my reply..."I grew Italian...watching Sesame Street..."
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Re: HELP! I blew it!

Post by nuccia »

When I first read this I also had to laugh but I was afraid of offending anyone but I have to admit, I don't feel so bad about what I did now.

I do speak Italian (well, a dialect anyway) and I have called and visited Italy on several occasions. On one of my trips to Italy when I was very young we were visiting a friend of the family who wanted to feed me MORE food (we had already been at the table for hours and I wanted to go home and sleep). It was only my second day there and I wasn't used to the time change.

So I thanked our hostess and told her I was tired (or so I thought). It appears I called her a cow instead..I called her a vacca! I thought my father was going to kill me.. hehe

That same summer the town elder wanted something I had from "America". I didn't want to part with it. SO this 80 year old woman thought she would be cute and spoke the only words she knew in English which was "son of a B****". Not missing a beat, I responded with "Figlia di P******". I was nine years old. I thought my mother would die of shame..but my aunts thought it was hilarious. I am still reminded of this every time I visit Italy and this was over 40 years ago! The woman passed away about 20 years later but I did see her again on my honeymoon where she stood in the street waiting for me with a big hug and gift. She said she never forgot that day on the beach or how much she laughed at my comment...

So be thankful the person you spoke to at least never saw your face. Things could have been worse.

Wonder if that poor man (your "father") is till in one piece. Bet he had a lot of explaining to do... :lol: :lol: :lol:
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milagiro
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Re: HELP! I blew it!

Post by milagiro »

nuccia,
hahahahaha! Oh yeah, I bet that poor man is still hearing about it!
Well, I have certainly learned my lesson and am working on a letter writing campaign now!

Thank you everybody for your input and big-hearted nature!
- milagiro
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