Wording

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darkerhorse
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Wording

Post by darkerhorse »

I'm writing a family narrative.

This is the original sentence:
Salvatore Russo was Grandpa Vincenzo's paternal 1st cousin, son of his father’s brother Giuseppe Russo and Filomena Saraceno.

Is this wording an improvement or confusing:
Salvatore Russo was Grandpa Vincenzo's paternal 1st cousin, son of his father’s brother Uncle Giuseppe Russo and Aunt Filomena Saraceno.
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MarcuccioV
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Re: Wording

Post by MarcuccioV »

darkerhorse wrote: 04 May 2025, 21:37 I'm writing a family narrative.

This is the original sentence:
Salvatore Russo was Grandpa Vincenzo's paternal 1st cousin, son of his father’s brother Giuseppe Russo and Filomena Saraceno.

Is this wording an improvement or confusing:
Salvatore Russo was Grandpa Vincenzo's paternal 1st cousin, son of his father’s brother Uncle Giuseppe Russo and Aunt Filomena Saraceno.
Based on the fact that it's a "family" narrative, I think the addition of the familial relationships is appropriate. If it were for general public reading, the former might work better and be less "personal"...
Mark

If you ignore your foundation, your house will soon collapse...

Surnames: Attiani Belli Bucci Calvano Cerci Del Brusco Falera Giorgi Latini Marsili Mattia Mezzo Nardecchia Pellegrini Piacentini Pizzuti Pontecorvo Recchia Topani Ziantona & Zorli
darkerhorse
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Re: Wording

Post by darkerhorse »

Thanks for your input.

It's written for my family. I was thinking from my grandfather's perspective - writing about his relatives in relation to him - he would identify his first cousin Salvatore as his uncle's and aunt's son.

By the way, the names were changed to protect the innocent.
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MarcuccioV
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Re: Wording

Post by MarcuccioV »

darkerhorse wrote: 04 May 2025, 22:13
By the way, the names were changed to protect the innocent.
LOL. So I assumed -- I don't know if you can get more generic than "Russo". I think there's at least one in EVERY Italian domicile...
Mark

If you ignore your foundation, your house will soon collapse...

Surnames: Attiani Belli Bucci Calvano Cerci Del Brusco Falera Giorgi Latini Marsili Mattia Mezzo Nardecchia Pellegrini Piacentini Pizzuti Pontecorvo Recchia Topani Ziantona & Zorli
darkerhorse
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Re: Wording

Post by darkerhorse »

I figured Russo was the most prevalent surname.

I think Salvatore is the most common male first name in Sicily. Do you have any in your would-be "Sicilian" line?
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MarcuccioV
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Re: Wording

Post by MarcuccioV »

darkerhorse wrote: 04 May 2025, 22:47 I figured Russo was the most prevalent surname.

I think Salvatore is the most common male first name in Sicily. Do you have any in your would-be "Sicilian" line?
There might be -- I'd have to check through them again. I did, however, learn that my mother & GGM's name, Modesta, is much more popular in Sicily than it is on the peninsula (and even rarer to our commune)...

I have found often that the most popular name in a particular commune is that of its patron Saint -- in ours it's Luigi/Luigia/Luisa, as the patron Saint is Aloysius (Louis) of Gonzaga...

Since St Agatha is the patron of the island, I'd assume 'Agata' would be a very common female name in much of Sicily.

P.S. I checked my tree, and I do have about a half-dozen Salvatore's. Only one is a direct relative; the rest through marriage. Don't know about DNA matches...
Mark

If you ignore your foundation, your house will soon collapse...

Surnames: Attiani Belli Bucci Calvano Cerci Del Brusco Falera Giorgi Latini Marsili Mattia Mezzo Nardecchia Pellegrini Piacentini Pizzuti Pontecorvo Recchia Topani Ziantona & Zorli
darkerhorse
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Re: Wording

Post by darkerhorse »

I agree about first names given after the patron saint of the town - both male and female forms. Of course, Salvatrice for Salvatore is rare. Maybe Teresa is used?

Is Salvo a version of Salvatore, as in Montalbano?

Does it have to be a direct relative?
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MarcuccioV
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Re: Wording

Post by MarcuccioV »

darkerhorse wrote: 04 May 2025, 23:43 I agree about first names given after the patron saint of the town - both male and female forms. Of course, Salvatrice for Salvatore is rare. Maybe Teresa is used?

Is Salvo a version of Salvatore, as in Montalbano?

Does it have to be a direct relative?
I'd assume Salvo could be an alternative. No, it doesn't need to be direct. I'm concentrating more on surnames -- so far I've found a few that are native to both locales -- including my GF's surname. Connections still elude me...
Mark

If you ignore your foundation, your house will soon collapse...

Surnames: Attiani Belli Bucci Calvano Cerci Del Brusco Falera Giorgi Latini Marsili Mattia Mezzo Nardecchia Pellegrini Piacentini Pizzuti Pontecorvo Recchia Topani Ziantona & Zorli
darkerhorse
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Re: Wording

Post by darkerhorse »

MarcuccioV wrote: 04 May 2025, 21:58
darkerhorse wrote: 04 May 2025, 21:37 I'm writing a family narrative.

This is the original sentence:
Salvatore Russo was Grandpa Vincenzo's paternal 1st cousin, son of his father’s brother Giuseppe Russo and Filomena Saraceno.

Is this wording an improvement or confusing:
Salvatore Russo was Grandpa Vincenzo's paternal 1st cousin, son of his father’s brother Uncle Giuseppe Russo and Aunt Filomena Saraceno.
Based on the fact that it's a "family" narrative, I think the addition of the familial relationships is appropriate. If it were for general public reading, the former might work better and be less "personal"...
Does it need punctuation?

Salvatore Russo was Grandpa Vincenzo's paternal 1st cousin, son of his father’s brother, Uncle Giuseppe Russo and Aunt Filomena Saraceno.

or

Salvatore Russo was Grandpa Vincenzo's paternal 1st cousin, son of his father’s brother - Uncle Giuseppe Russo and Aunt Filomena Saraceno.
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MarcuccioV
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Re: Wording

Post by MarcuccioV »

darkerhorse wrote: 05 May 2025, 18:50
Salvatore Russo was Grandpa Vincenzo's paternal 1st cousin, son of his father’s brother - Uncle Giuseppe Russo and Aunt Filomena Saraceno.
I like using the hyphen better, too many comma's make it seem like a run-on sentence. Mind you, I'm attempting to channel high school composition -- and that was over 45 years ago... :P
Mark

If you ignore your foundation, your house will soon collapse...

Surnames: Attiani Belli Bucci Calvano Cerci Del Brusco Falera Giorgi Latini Marsili Mattia Mezzo Nardecchia Pellegrini Piacentini Pizzuti Pontecorvo Recchia Topani Ziantona & Zorli
darkerhorse
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Re: Wording

Post by darkerhorse »

Did they even have grammar back then?

Here's another alternative:
Salvatore Russo was Grandpa Vincenzo's paternal 1st cousin, son of his Uncle Giuseppe Russo (his father’s brother) and Aunt Filomena Saraceno.

I'm spending so much time on this because the sentence formula gets repeated ad nauseum.

For second cousins, it might read:
Salvatore Russo was Grandpa Vincenzo's paternal 2nd cousin, son of his father's paternal 1st cousin - Giuseppe Russo - and Filomena Saraceno.

I added a second hyphen because I know you like them.
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MarcuccioV
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Re: Wording

Post by MarcuccioV »

darkerhorse wrote: 05 May 2025, 22:35
I added a second hyphen because I know you like them.
You're very perceptive -- LOL. I use both hyphens and parantheticals as I'm certain you've witnessed in my posts.

I guess it all boils down to whatever looks best to you. I personally prefer the hyphen in this particular case, however...
Mark

If you ignore your foundation, your house will soon collapse...

Surnames: Attiani Belli Bucci Calvano Cerci Del Brusco Falera Giorgi Latini Marsili Mattia Mezzo Nardecchia Pellegrini Piacentini Pizzuti Pontecorvo Recchia Topani Ziantona & Zorli
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